We as individuals are taught at an early age to be content with what we have.
We’ve all heard the many sayings and cliché’s about counting your blessings. Don’t covet others possessions; jealousy only breeds discontentment. You might not have what you want but you do have what you need. Be thankful, someone else is always in a worse situation. While perspective is truly the essential key to being truly happy could it be this same glass half full perspective that keeps us content to stay in dead end situations, careers and relationships?
We all have lapses in life where we are truly miserable. An unsatisfying relationship, a loathsome job, an unbalanced friendship but if we are really unhappy why do we stay? Why do we continue to give so much of ourselves, time that we’ll never experience again for something that reaps no benefits? It’s the comfort of the comfort zone, better the devil you know. It is the uncertainty, fear of change, fear of new, fear of a risk that we may possibly regret. But that is just the platform to the real underlying reason; what lies beneath the stage is the lack of faith within ourselves, the sub-conscious thought that you’re incapable of doing better, or that something better would ever happen to someone like you.
I never believed myself to be the marrying type, just too fickle and too moody to spend forever with someone. So when my ex-fiancé’ proposed to me, initially I hesitated, but later accepting. But I knew he wasn’t the one, I knew it wasn’t the right decision. So why did I say yes, why did I accept? It was only after careful introspection and snapshot reviews of all the moments that led to the engagement that intrinsically I thought that I couldn’t do better. I believed that no one else would propose to me so I might as well accept. We tried to put the pieces of a shattered relationship together but there were just too many cracks. But it was truly my lack of faith in me that I even considered short changing myself into a marriage that would have most surely ended in divorce.
My entire life I have worked in the behavioral health field with children with mental disabilities. I just changed career’s less than three years ago. Initially I was very happy; I was working with sane adults with better benefits and better pay. I was recently promoted to a position that offered even more money, but also much more responsibility. I have altered my perspective in such a way that I can see a full cup in an empty glass; but as time has progressed in this position, I have been miserable. No one is super stoked about their jobs but at the same time I don’t feel your job should make you depressed. But yet I say; I stay for the consistency, the consistent paycheck, the consistent routine, it is truly the devil that I know.
We all are free to choose any choice we make; however we are not free from the consequence of that choice. The hardest thing in life is to change, just small changes like eating better or dropping a bad habit requires extreme discipline. So whether you choose to stay unhappy, stay in a situation that offers no benefits or growth, or step into unknown and change your life for the better is all up to you. You can choose to be complacent with what you have or choose to risk everything to find out if there’s more.